A little more sunshine

Someone read my blog and wondered out loud what happened to all my negative writing. ‘Bring back the negative writing.’

I took a good 2 minutes to reply. Not because I was stumped, but because I was laughing my head silly. It’s amazing how people relish in other people’s misfortune. That’s why reality shows still live strong. That’s why newspapers get sold. And why Korean drama has such a huge fan base.

The more dramatic and victimized the person is in the story, the more following it receives. Because everyone craves watching other people suffer a little more than they do. If life’s the shits, it’s always good to know someone has it shittier.

But I’m not negative anymore and I like it better this way. Being pessimistic is like pouring slime into a cup; you can only fill it up so much. And after that, it just overflows. I’ve still got it in me, that nugget of negativity that will haunt me for life. It’s still there. But no more or less than there ought to be.

And it’s nicer this way. It’s nicer to have lived through tough patches and know oneself a little better. Nice to get up each morning, a little more focused, a little more stronger and a lot more in sync with myself. Except for pre-menstrual moments and days when i don't have my coffee fix, my mind hasn't been so clear since…err…since high school.

And it is wonderful to finally look into the mirror and go, ‘Hey there…
I know you…’